Memories. I hate you.

Hmm...currently hooked up with a song "TELL ME WHY" by Taylor Swift:

I took a chance, i took a shot
and you might think i'm bulletproof, but i'm not
you took a swing, i took it hard
and down here from the ground i see who you are

I'm sick and tired of your attitude
I'm feeling like i don't know you
you tell me that you love me then you cut me down
and i need you like a heartbeat
but you know you got a mean streak
makes me run for cover when you're around
and here's to you and your temper
yes, i remember what you said last night
and i know that you see what you're doing to me
tell me why..

You could write a book on
how to ruin someone's perfect day
well i get so confused and frustrated
forget what i'm trying to say, oh

I'm sick and tired of your reasons
I got no one to believe in
you tell me that you want me, then push me around
and i need you like a heartbeat
but you know you got a mean streak
makes me run for cover when you're around
here's to you and your temper
yes, i remember what you said last night
and i know that you see what you're doing to me
tell me why..

why..do you have to make me feel small
so you can feel whole inside
why..do you have to put down my dreams
so you're the only thing on my mind

i'm sick and tired of your attitude
i'm feeling like i don't know you
you tell me that you want me then cut me down
i'm sick and tired of your reasons
i've got no one to believe in
you ask me for my love then you push me around
here's to you and your temper
yes, i remember what you said last night
and i know that you see what you're doing to me
tell me why
why, tell me why

i take a step back, let you go
i told you i'm not bulletproof
now you know

Haiz, i just love that song ♥♥♥

Okay..my life just suck! :( Memories get stuck with me. But...the prob is, the memories that i hold, isn't something worth remembering. Its...all WRONG. Everything started wrongly. The memories shouldn't even be created in the first place. Haiz...these past few days, i kept thinking of what i did, with you. What stupid and childish things i did with you. And now, everything ended for some stupid reasons. -.- Hmm...i wasn't suppose to think of all this, i have what i want, but...i feel...somehow, SAD :( Haiz...everything is just wrong. It all started with you, why must u ______ me?! If u dun, and u didn't do anything, things wouldn't end up like this. WONT! We will still be happily chattig, joking, playing, smsing. Just because of 1 stupid thing, the whole thing change. I'm struggling now, but i ffel dat u are not. As i said, u will find sm1 else. Sm1 better, sm1 to keep u company. But...ever consider how i feel? U noe how hard it is to make this decision? HUH? I guess u dunno. How could u possibly know. U must be treating me as a cause to yr heart breakage. :( Haiz..seriously, not only u ffel depressed, i feel it too. We had shared memories, and i'm forced to make a decision. After i made my decision, okay. U decided to follow it. U have someone to feel up your loneliness. What about me? What about us? What about all the things that happened past few months? Can i have a time-machine? I hate it. Shit.
NOTE: Dun ever mention yr name to me. Once i hear it, the memories will come rushing to me. (which i hate and i dun wish to remember). And, although i will still see you, i will feel ashamed. Dunno why. But just..ashamed. Maybe guilty? Yea? Cuz i hurt u? But, think carefully, i hurt u and me. Well, should be me who is more upset. I'm force to make a decision, but...u were really once my..."closer than family" person. Haiz.

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